Lifespan Integration Therapy
When healing is absent in the past, it is impossible to be fully present in the NOW
I qualified 20 years ago and over the years have done much further training to develop an integrative approach in the therapy I offer.
Problems and difficulties manifesting in the present are signposts to unresolved issues in the past. Lifespan Integration Therapy is done in a structured way with specific coaching from me, the therapist, to your adult self: in effect coaching your adult self to heal and nurture your child (or younger) self, and in doing so updating neurological pathways. When healing is absent in the past, it is impossible to be fully whole or present in the NOW. LI therapy travels back to THEN and gathers up blocked energy and brings it to the present, allowing a more whole and integrated self to thrive and be here, now.
This work is helpful to a range of people, including therapists, who have done a lot of work on themselves and have reached a limit of how far normal talking therapy can take them.
I particularly welcome therapists and the people that are committed to continued integration.
Lifespan Integration Protocols
A brief description of some of the protocols used in Lifespan Integration:
Overall regulating and integrating neural networking.
Processing stuck unpleasant or past traumatic events.
Attachment issues in the present that are caused by from deficits in early attachment with mother I think we all can benefit from being attuned.
Birth – Present protocol
Birth Trauma, if you know you were induced, cesarian or any other difficult entry into the world.
Cell being protocol
Prenatal trauma or if you were an unwanted pregnancy, also systemic and generational trauma.
Attachment Repair Protocol
Repairs ruptures to attachment and developmental stages, particularly ages 1-3 (pre verbal).
Script Clearing protocol
If you have an undermining script, like I’m not important, or I will be abandoned etc.
Relationship Clearing Protocol
If theres a relationship that is still ‘in you’.
A recent accident or trauma.
Get In Touch
Cost: £70 pro rata (pro rata means per hour, only charging for time actually used, not exceeding £105).
Up to 90 minute sessions as needed
LI Supervision / Consultancy
Contact me if you are interested in receiving LI Supervision / Consultancy
Some LI Feedback From Recent and Current Clients
I couldn’t recommend Lifespan integration therapy in general, and Vajralila in particular, more highly. I hadn’t had any therapy before I started my sessions with Vajralila and I was keen to find something that could give me tools beyond those I already had to address some hard to shift psychological patterns that weren’t serving me.
I can honestly say that after 6 months of sessions I feel transformed. I feel happier, stronger and just more myself. The techniques and processes that LI uses were at times intense, but always made intuitive sense and provided profound results. I am leaving with a healthier happier perspective and a set of tools that I’m sure will continue to help my psychological well being.
I’m so thrilled about this I can’t wait til our next session to tell you but I think something profound has happened this week in relation to alcohol and food. I feel as if I’m a different person. If this persists…then LI truly is revolutionary! Ive never experienced myself in this non-compulsive way before. It’s so quietly great.
I’d experienced various types of talking therapy over the years, some more effective than others, but there was always a sense that something hadn’t really been sorted, that the intellectual concepts of what was going on for me were clearer, but the felt problem wasn’t shifting. The Lifespan Integration work I did with Vajralila changed all that. A strong sense of continuity and coherence of self emerged, my sense of my life narrative changed for the better, and it’s stayed that way!
Vajralila clearly explained the process and held the session with empathy and ease.
I was able to be smoothly led into an early traumatic memory with clear guidance and sensitivity to when i needed to pause or have instructions clarified. As a result i found a new confidence in relation to the memory and could feel this as an assured solid feel in the centre of my body. This feels like a touchstone i can reconnect with when i need to. For some days after the session I experienced a lot of energy releasing in my body. I noticed too that it was easier to raise difficult issues with people that i would have previously avoided.
Vajralila’s skill, presence and authenticity are invaluable to facilitate this work that has allowed me to process and to move on from a ‘stuck’ past traumatic event.
I found it a great relief to have somebody to actively listen to my story of my accident. I felt held and heard and able to allow myself to feel safely. It was fascinating to me to see my feelings shifting as we revisited the story as my counsellor reread key points. I also found it a good focus to hear the questions beforehand of what constitutes PTSD and this enabled me to reflect over the following week on my own process and what was happening within me. Although i was processing my accident this therapy made it easier and quicker for me to recover and make sense of my reactions. It felt a healthy structured way to heal.
Yesterday’s session was wonderful, thank you so much! I had a meeting this morning about support groups and it was outstandingly noticeable to me that I didn’t go in to my usual inferiority stance and shameful embarrassment. I confidently held my space and acknowledged with my adult self what I could offer them. It felt great! This is absolute evidence of our marvelous work together, so thank you again so so much!
I felt great at the time of the session, and in what I can only describe as a ‘cloud’ for the rest of the day. I remained aware of my hands – getting visual images of the dolls/a baby’s hands, sometimes of you massaging them, sometimes of them as cold and stiff. The following morning (thank you universe for this meeting). I feel like completing the birth protocol is something I’ve been waiting for, my whole life. while during the birth protocol, in the regressed state and reviewing the timeline from an embodied place of safety, it all felt like a breeze. There was a sense of sadness too, that it hadn’t been there all along. So some grief coming too.
It was quite a surprise to me to feel held in the process during what Vajralila named as hypo-dissociation – a response I am aware I go to during moments of strong distress e.g withdrawal in a heated argument – but I hadn’t before been able to be a self-witness to this experience. This was illuminating. When I was yawning / dissociating I was aware, as I said, of the process being tiring, it felt tiring to be exposed to material from my timeline so many times and to be processing stuff. I felt tired for the remainder of the day.
I feel markedly closer to the experiences of my life now. My life feels like a concertina of experiences that open and close as I pass my eye back through the years.
Having being adopted at the age of 2 months old, I have always held onto the narrative of ‘being rejected or abandoned’ by my birth parents, even though rationally I understood the circumstances were quite different. I have also understood through study, that trauma and memories can become trapped in the body. During my experience with Vajralila, I was surprised at the well of sadness that arose, when during a recall of my timeline (birth protocol) in our session she asked me to say goodbye to my birth parents. I realised with the ability to express my thoughts in the session, how powerless my early years had felt, with perhaps a ‘victim-like’ status of ‘life is happening to me’ rather than knowing and understanding I was part of it and may have influence on it.
A process of mine which I know to be a defense mechanism against shame and vulnerability was to become strong, and not let others in. Although I may be able to show my vulnerability, I have sometimes felt incongruent and repelled by it, my defense would be to push others away, rather than sit with the uncomfortable emotions to process them. I had an experience in my personal life, after my work with Vajralila that allowed me to notice in real time the process of defense rising, which sometimes has me blaming others or myself. To be able to see and feel these emotions and my defense mechanism in action, allowed me to be more congruent and rational about the event and how to proceed in a healing manner, resolving the situation rather than adding destruction to the mix.
The compassion for my ‘early dependent on others baby/child’ was sometimes tempting to shut down in the session, but over time and with the attunement of the therapist, I was able to accept and turn towards the reality that indeed we are incredibly vulnerable in those early years, and that shutting others out, was merely my early coping mechanism against the ‘felt’ shame and vulnerability.
I received Lifetime Integration Therapy with Vajralila over a period of 6 months. I found this therapy to be hugely beneficial and has enabled me to live a more fulfilling life, with clarity and contentment. I found the therapy work to be hard at times but the directiveness of it helped me to understand the process. Vajralila always kept me safe and we always worked at my pace. I would recommend this therapy for anyone who has experienced past trauma and abuse, especially where the memory of the abuse is not clear.
Over the last twenty years or so I have tried different therapies to address traumatic events from my childhood. These therapies include hypnotherapy, psychotherapy and rebirthing, all of which have been effective in their own way. Over the last few months I have been engaged with the technique of Lifespan Integration, in the very capable hands of Vajralila, and I have to say, it’s been a massive success for me. I now have a new calmness and a serenity in my life which has eluded me all my life. L.I. has a wonderful elegance to it, using the body itself to monitor emotional response, rather than the mind, which can be ambivalent or an intellectual construct. There is much about it I don’t pretend to understand, but I do know that I go home feeling great. And it’s noticed!
Thank you again for the opportunity to experience the LI way of working. I’ve found the whole experience profoundly beneficial; transformational, actually.
One of the very important points for me was the trust I have in you as a therapist, supervisor and wonderful human being.
I anticipated that the process of writing down my memories would bring up other memories and emotions so I gave myself proper time and space to do that. And I did feel lots of emotions, thinking about my past quite a lot during the process of writing and the days leading to the actual session.
Guiding me to visualise my safe space was a wonderful thing. I still think about it and take myself there quite often. It feels like the imaginary place does exist in real life and as if I have been there in real life. My senses engage with that visualisation in such a way that I can feel the cool water, the warm air and hear the sounds from that place. This co-created place and space is powerful and I will cherish it from now on.
Since the session I’ve been thinking about when you guided me to meet the one year old little me and that image is so part of me now! It feels like that is a real memory, that that encounter has happened in real life. And I love taking the little me to my safe place and having her touch my arms with her little hands. It feels so real! It feels my heart with love and warmth not just toward the little me but toward life itself. I have tears of joy running through my face as I write this.
Taking the little me through my life memories was so powerful! It brought up so many emotions and it felt good, with a mix of compassion, forgiveness and feeling proud for all the things I’ve experienced and learned along the way.
The moment when you guided me to let the little me melt into myself in the embrace felt natural and was already happening when you started the invitation.
I cannot tank you you enough for the joy and privilege of such profound experience. I don’t know if it’s just the consequence of that session but I’ve been feeling better about myself, with a kind of self-love that feels different and it’s not just a knowing in my head. It’s a different knowing, a knowing in the deepest parts of my heart.
I’m forever grateful for this healing and hope that the people that will come your way to experience the LI through you will be blessed as I did.
I wanted to thank you again for the work we’ve done. The last few days have again shown me the changes in myself, and I know I wouldn’t be here without you, so thank you so much again.
I am so, so different from this time last year. I have been content on my own. I’ve enjoyed being in touch with how I feel. Things and people that last year would have made me anxious, nervous, intimidated, etc, haven’t bothered me. When I have been bothered, I’ve either found ways to do things that are good for me, or found ways to get me out of the stressful situation.
The work with Vajralila started in a way before I entered the room; it started when I was filling out the Timeline with past memories. I wanted to focus on my gender difficulties that I have been experiencing since I was a young child. Memories came up which I had forgotten about, as well as emotions around my gender which I had put on the side. I found the session profound and the work very deep. Meeting my younger self was very healing and moving. I felt that my adult self and my inner child were able to meet and integrate for the first time, as well as love and support each other. Vajralila created a safe, non-judgmental and contained space, which enabled me to explore my difficulties around my gender identity.
Writing the timeline: I found the writing of the timeline to be much more involved and time-consuming than I had expected – once I had started I realised that to go through in such a systematic way required me to really engage with my childhood and later life as I lived it, to put it back together in a sequence like that. And this had to happen over a period of 3-4 days. I didn’t mind the effort – it felt like a heart-full process and an act of self love to do a review of my life in this way, although remembering difficult moments and traumatic events was hard. It felt like the therapy had started since I was reviewing the difficult moments and phases in my life but with the anticipation that some of this would be processed in the session (my positive pre-transference to Vajralila doing some therapeutic work with me.)
I am positive, after having paid enough attention these past few months, that since the session I have been experiencing something I had never thought or felt before:
I have a strong sense of place and I know I have the right to be here and to be alive. There is a sense of entitlement I have never felt or considered before. I am here and I have the right to be.